The Report Card

By Chloe Popescu

I don't love election day. For the past two elections, these evenings glued to the TV have usually meant Chinese take out and extreme disappointment. The first Tuesday in November is cursed. It always feel too weird, too surreal. The stars are never aligned on this day. As goes Election Day 2008, I  had hope that this day would be hopeful, exciting and truly historical. Maybe, but still completely schizoid.

Let me explain. I woke up yesterday morning to the sounds of Bob Marley coming in through my window. My apartment building, conveniently located next door to a voting station, was just within earshot of a massive line of voters outside. They weren't bored, stressed, annoyed. They weren't even acting like Americans. Soccer moms had even come down from Maryland to pass out baked goods to voters. So there they were: citizens from every walk of life chomping down on cookies and chillin' to "One Love." I knew this day would be surreal.

I got out of the house and did my usual morning ritual of checking out the news. Guess what the headlines were this morning? Perez Hilton was telling me to get my ass to Ben and Jerry's, voters were getting free ice cream cones - but you have to have a sticker proclaiming that you voted. Hipsters could also get there fix of free "stuff", Starbucks was serving free coffee with the "I Voted" sticker. I didn't consider any of these pitiful voting incentives and made my way to class. Two hours later, as I made my way back across campus, I saw what looked like a dance party in an open plaza in the center of campus. Not exactly. I got closer and saw free ice cream and snacks for students who voted. Oh, wait, no sticker? Next.
   
I got back inside my apartment only to find my roommate glued to her laptop screen. "Chick-Fil- A is giving away free chicken sandwiches today. Did you vote yet? I need that sticker."

Before I could even reply, there was a knock on our door. It was a girl who lived down the hall. She wanted to get to Krispy Kreme before they ran out of free election-themed dough nuts. She wanted to know if we had an extra "I Voted" sticker. (Note: This wasn't written for the sake of the story. I am a journalist. This really happened.)